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i'm losing my brother...again Thursday, Aug. 28, 2003 - 7:08 p.m. not much to say today...only that i have realized in the past few weeks not to expect anything from people. sure, they expect plenty from me, but obviously i am different. here's how i see it. if you expect nothing, then you can never be disappointed. i seem to be the one that gets disappointed all the time. so now, my attitude is one of non chalance. whatever, yep, that's who it goes from now on. seriously, one gets tired of things always being changed, you know. i'm not talking about normal change. i'm saying certain things dealing w/ me, for example, are always changed, but not for others. it hurts sometimes, alot. especially from those you think it wouldn't come from. as time goes on, the hurt seems to fade and it's just like no big deal anymore. i'm at that point now. i know, i'm probably talking in riddles and no one will understand me, but that's alright b/c i understand what i'm saying. it's all good, though. this weekend is labor day weekend. am i excited? nope. doing anything big? nope. any plans? nope. the story of my life, it seems. i guess i can study my LOMA, or at least start. it'll be something to do. and at least i don't work on monday. then the next weekend, my dreaded birthday. i planned on going home this weekend, but i'm not sure if it will happen now. it's crazy. tonight will probably be the last time i see my friend maher before he moves to canada on saturday. i'm proud of him, though. he's going to get his PhD in physics. that boy is smart as all get out. he's like my brother and i'm seriously going to miss him. he's one of the few people that has always been there when i needed him. he give me the best advice and whenever i'm down or really pissed, he always says the right things to make it all better. yep, i'm going to miss that boy. oh well, i'd better start getting ready for our last night out. until later.

need more? ♠
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