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Thursday, Dec. 26, 2002 - 12:55 a.m. well, my newphew was living in virginia with my sister. he hated it. i remember the day he left. i had to take him to my sister's so they could leave. he cried all the way there saying 'i want my granddaddy.' well, my nephew cannot stand my sister's boyfriend, glenn, who she is living with. they just don't know get along. he is not happy living in virginia and he is not doing well in school at all. i guess it finally hit my sister that he really doesn't like it there. so she called my mom and told her that she thinks paylor needs to come to school down here. my mom was so happy. let me give you a little background on that. my sister said paylor could come here the week after christmas. my mom wanted paylor here the week of christmas and after...my sister said no. paylor called crying on the phone b/c he wanted to be here so bad. fine. my sister finally gave in. then she got the interim report from paylor's school. b/c of rudness and disruptivness in school environment, he had a day of in school suspension and if he didn't go to it, he would get suspended. i hear what he goes through up there, always getting into fights b/c someone is talking about his mom or making fun of him. my sister will meet a new person and then ship paylor off to their house so she can go out w/ glenn or party or do whatever. that's not right. especially considering paylor has had some serious hard times in his life. he is 11 years old and he thinks he is the reason his parents broke up. his father lives in georgia and every time her goes to see him, he comes back emtionally scared. he has recently said he doesn't want to go back. when my sister packed up everything and moved to virginia, she also stopped paylor from going to his counselor. see, every since my sister's divorce, paylor has to see a couselor and he was on medication. that's not easy on a kid, i know. so my sister takes him away from everything that he has ever known to drag him to live w/ an asshole that resents him. great! there is a reason i said all of that. when my sister called my mom and asked could paylor go to school down here, my mom jumped at the chance. not just b/c she doesn't want to be separated from her grandkid, but b/c she knows what is really best for paylor. i agree on that note. well, my mom went about it the wrong way. she made the decision, told my sister yes and called it a day. she told me about it, told my aunts and uncles....but didn't tell my dad. yeah, you can imagine how not happy about this he was. no, on second thought, you can't imagine. my dad is the head of the household, buy he also knows that major decisions need to be made by not just one person, like my mom did. that is what my dad is mad at the most. it makes him even madder that everyone in the family, his family and my mom's family, is behind my mom all the way. they know she is doing what is best, she just went about it the wrong way. so my dad hasn't been talking to my mom for about 5 days. well, maybe 4 or something like that. my mom told me he said they needed some separation time. he told her he was going to pack her bags for her by the time she got home from work. alright, this is something my dad has been threatening since i was in elementary school. obviously, no one paid him any attention. so now he is just pouting and not talking. that makes me sad. the thing that upsets him the most, i think, is my sister. when she dropped paylor off, she dropped him off at my granddaddy's house. she didn't even come by here to speak to my dad. he was so mad at that. my mom told her that was really stupid of her. she called my apartment tuesday right before my mom and i left. she was upset b/c she called the house and my dad yelled at her bad. that was her own fault and she should have expected it. my mom told her not to call back to the house for a while...to at least wait until my dad calmed down. i think he is slowly breaking his silence, but i know how he is. i am like him. when he thinks he has been wronged or deserves an appology or is just plain upset, he's gonna be that way until he feels he has gotten his point across. i understand where my dad is coming from, my mom really should have thought about consulting him before she did anything...but you have to look at the big picture. it's not about them, it's about paylor and what is best for him. it boils down to paylor needing to be in a place where he knows he is loved no matter what he does or doesn't do. he feels that here. the cutest thing happend on tuesday evening, christmas eve. our family had our annual christmas eve dinner here. paylor wanted to know if his two cousins were coming. my mom told him no, but that was a lie. of course, paylor threw a temper tantrum and said he was not going to talk to anyone b/c his cousins weren't gonna be here. yeah, he cried like a little bitch. then when people started getting here, he ran outside in the yard, as happy as can be and yelled, 'i am home, i live here now!' everyone thought that was so funny. he pretty much did the same thing when he got here monday night. when he came in the door, he dropped his bags and said 'now i'm really back at home. now grandma and granddaddy will be my mom and dad, too!' i don't think my sister ever really realizes how her actions affect others. my, my brother and sister didn't have everything we wanted growing up and we definitely had our hard times, but we always knew we were loved and never had to go w/o what we needed. my sister never thinks about that, nor does she think about the fact that paylor needs to know that he is loved no matter what. last weekend he was w/ our aunt who lives in virginia. he wet the bed in the middle of the night and my aunt just got him up and changed the sheets, no big deal. when he thought she was gone, he got out of the bed, got on his hands and knees. my aunt came back in and asked him what he was doing. he was crying. he turned and said, 'i was praying to God to not let families be mad at me and mean to me and not make fun of me anymore.' my question is, why were families being mean to him in the first place, you know? obviously, my sister has paylor spending the night w/ people he doesn't know and he gets scared. do you blame him? hell if i would be shipping my child off to people so i can go out and do my thing. whatever, take responsiblities for your actions. knowing all that, and a lot more than i just am not writing down, you can understand why my mom made the decision she made. well, my dad thinks the entire family is against him. no, he's got to understand it's not a 'me against the world' type thing. my dad just sits there in his chair w/ his hand in his head, shakind his head looking at nothing. he feels like everyone has gone over his head. at least he knows that his graddaddy loves him no matter what, even if he does act anti social now. my mom told my sister she is going to eventually have to talk to my dad and whatever she tells him, she deserves. how are you going to diss your child and family for a man? i mean really! especially if he was the same man that hit you exactly a year go today. yeah, i remember it b/c we were at her house w/ the cops there. this is the first christmas in a long time where she wasn't here. the first one since she's had a kid anyway. my mom, her #1 champion, is even disgusted about the way she handled this. you know, i remember easter last year, we had dinner at her house, the entire family. we were playing uno. glenn was playing w/ us. he tries to be a smart ass fucker. anyway, got into it w/ my brother, over some freaking cards. my brother was just pointing out his mistake. if you're gonna enter our family, you've got to know we joke. glenn gets pissed off and starts cussing my brother and throws the cards. wrong move. my brother stands up and glenn gets in his face and starts yelling. i'm not letting someone yell at my brother, so i told him to back off. he is about to walk away, my brother said something about him being stupid and he wants to come back and start something, so i step up to him and my brother is right behind me. my brother and i go outside and glenn storms off to the back of the house. keeping in mind the entire family is right in the living room watching this, my mom and dad's family..yes, even my granddaddy. my father is outside and we tell him what is going on and he was ready to beat the crap out of glenn. what does my sister do? she tells me and my brother to leave. this is supposed to be a family function, easter mind you, and she is making us leave b/c her boyfriend couldn't take the fact that someone called him on being wrong. oh, did i mention that he threw the fact that he was in the marines in our face...his point being??? we have enough military people in our family not to even care. no one in our family likes glenn. he's too much like my sister's ex husband. she loves glenn and will do anything for him, even ignore her own son. that's pathetic. my mom wants to protect her little baby, paylor. my dad wants to be included on major decisions in the family, but also he wants to tell my sister about herself. my mom tries to be the shield b/t my sister and my dad and always ends up getting the brunt of heat. my dad's sisters try to keep my mom together b/c they're like sisters. my granddaddy hears of this stuff and gets upset b/c he doesn't like seeing his children not happy. i get upset when i don't feel unity at my parent's house and especially if i see my daddy upset. the funniest thing is, although all this is going on, paylor could care less b/c he knows he is HOME. he has moved into my old room, he doesn't have to go back to virginia and he knows that no matter what he does or says or what we do or say, we all love him. he wanted a playstation 2 for christmas, but he didn't get it. normally, he would have pitched a fit. the funny thing is, he didn't even get upset. why? b/c his main wish was answered...to be able to come back home. and he's home. i know my family will be alright. i know my dad will get over this. i know everything will be alright. as i always say, God won't give us anything we can't deal w/ it. besides, we never have to go through it alone. i know this may not sound like anything major to anyone else, and maybe, had this been any other time, i woudln't have considered it major, but we have never had family drama during christmas. my dad has never NOT gone to our the christmas day dinner. my grandfather knew that too. i know everyone is not religious and that is all good. but i do ask one thing of those that will. if you can, say a little prayer for me and my family, that we will be able to make it through this hurdle. every little bit helps. |
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