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the talk Friday, Mar. 01, 2002 - 1:09 p.m. alright. i promised and update on the ron situation and i shall do what i said i would do. well, i called hime before i left work on wednesday and left a message for him to come over between 6:00p.m. and 6:30p.m. he called at 6:30p.m. to say he was on his way. so he comes and ricky does too. later on while watching the grammys, ron wanted to go back to his place to get some money and to show me his place. okay, i am not stupid, i knew what was going on in his mind, but i trust him, so i said i would go. i asked him to clean out my dishwasher and he did, what a sweetie. we go to his place. it was nice, really nice. and his roommate wasn't there. oh, i forgot to say how i knew 'what he wanted from before.' when he called he asked could we hang and did i understand what he meant. i told him to go ahead and explain. he started talking and i stopped him mid sentence. why? because he was about to ask for some ass and i knew if i heard him say the words, i would have cussed him out. now, where was i? oh yeah, after he emptied my dishwasher, we left to go to his place. i follow him around the place. when we get to his room he acts like we are about to leave and then he hugs me and kisses me. i just said no, and he stopped immediately and we left. he acted like nothing big happened. so i decided this would be the perfect time to have our talk. i asked him did that bother him when i said no and he said it didn't. so i told him he can't expect me to put out whenever he wants it. i am not his girlfriend, but i am his friend. being that, i would like to be treated with a certain amount of respect. i do not like feeling like a whore or being used or taken for granted, which he does. i felt like i would have gotten through better to a brick wall, so i start crying and i stopped talking. when that happened, then he wants to try and console me. whatever. i told him that i really would like to consider him a friend. i do not always want sex from him or to use him. hell, if that were the case, october would not have been the last time i got some. he listened then. i guess you have to speak in terms of sex. i let him know what i expected out of my friends and him. it's a two way thing. i can't give and give only to receive nothing. if both people are looking after ron, who is looking after me? can't have that. so now we are friends. how good of friends are we? well, that remains to be seen. but i do realize that he does think of me more than just some ass. you gotta start somewhere, right. i did, however, convince him to buy me the 'o brother, where art thou' soundtrack. he laughed at me b/c i was loving some soggy bottom boys, but if it makes me happy, he will get it for me. ain't that just sweet. well, now i best get back to work. i have done good this morning. i have been doing my gustopo thing today. so far, i have recovred $954.94 worth of stuff that was wrongly charged to our cost center. go me. i am even questioning my boss on some of the stuff that she is doing. got to save some money, now.

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